Lyric day..

War in my mind.
There’s a war in my mind.
Seek and ye shall find,
That it’s howling all the time,
There’s a war in my mind.

Black in my soul.
It’s all black in my soul.
No diamond in the coal,
I reap just what I sow,
It’s all black in my soul.

– Beth Hart / War in My Mind

..time out.. ( more lyrics & quotes)

‘One need not be a chamber to be haunted; One need not be a house;
The brain has corridors surpassing Material place.’
— Emily Dickinson

“I have never seen battles quite as terrifyingly beautiful as the ones I fight when my mind splinters and races, to swallow me into my own madness, again.”
— Nicole Lyons / Hush

“And I keep on tellin’ everyone the truth,
But maybe that’s not the move,
And everyone wants to hear a strong opinion…
If it’s the same as you.
And they say honesty is the best policy,
If that were true,
Don’t think all of my friends would hate me.

— Bea Miller / That Bitch

Identity Pt. II.

Raistlin. Of course I was always Raistlin. Weren’t we all? I’m pretty sure that was the point. Or maybe I’m a bad judge of fiction. It’s been a while since I read it.

I don’t ever recall categorising or identifying characters by ‘gender role’ back then. Instead, sorted them by, as Magneto puts it, ‘what I want, and how I’m going to get it.’

I think that puts me….just over the Neutral/Good side of the True Neutral line..

Great, apparently my gender identity / awareness is based on an AD&D alignment table…As well as revealing me to be a massive nerd. Methinks I spake too much. (Contemplates deleting this post..)

With great power comes great mental illness / torment.

Seems to be one of those days. Time to get offline.

Not my art, modified without permission.

them feels.. (quotes from authors)

Some quotes on depression from two of my favourite authors, and pretty much how I feel right now.


” In every way that counted, I was dead. Inside somewhere maybe I was screaming and weeping and howling like an animal, but that was another person deep inside, another person who had no access to the lips and face and mouth and head, so on the surface I just shrugged and smile and kept moving. If I could have physically passed away, just let it all go, like that, without doing anything, stepped out of life as easily as walking through a door I would have done. But I was going to sleep at night and waking in the morning, disappointed to be there and resigned to existence.”. ― Neil Gaiman


“Depression is the most unpleasant thing I have ever experienced. . . . It is that absence of being able to envisage that you will ever be cheerful again. The absence of hope.
That very deadened feeling, which is so very different from feeling sad.
Sad hurts but it’s a healthy feeling. It is a necessary thing to feel.
Depression is very different.”. ― J.K. Rowling


Intermission: Lyrics

‘You were blessed by a different kind of inner view:
It’s all magnified.
The highs would make you fly,
And the lows make you want to die.
And I was once there,
Hanging from that very ledge where you are standing.
So I know, I know, I know,
It’s easier to let go. ‘


-Nightminds / Missy Higgins



‘There were sounds in my head,
Little voices whispering
That I should go and this should end,
Oh, and I found myself listening.’


-Where I stood / Missy Higgins



‘But that’s not how I feel about you,
In fact I never wanna see you at all.
So maybe I’ll inject gasoline in my eye,
And hold a lighter to my eyeball.’


-I’d Rather / Hank Green & The Perfect Strangers



‘You’re coming round too late,
I’ve taken off my face,
And you won’t like it.
I haven’t seen anyone in days,
But it’s best this way,
You see I don’t like it.
Don’t want to be anyone again.’


-Low Blows / Meg Mac

Intermission quotes #2

Melvin Udall: “People that talk in metaphors oughta shampoo my crotch.”

-As Good As it Gets

——-

Melvin Udall: “Some of us have great stories, pretty stories that take place at lakes, with boats, and friends, and noodle salad. Just no one in this car. But, a lot of people, that’s their story; good times, noodle salad. What makes it so hard is not that you had it bad, but that you’re that pissed that so many others had it good.”

– As Good As It Gets

———

“Procrastination is a way for us to be satisfied with second-rate results; we can always tell ourselves we’d have done a better job if only we had more time…If you’re good at rationalizing, you can keep yourself feeling rather satisfied this way, but it’s a cheap happy. You’re whittling your expectations of yourself down lower and lower.”

-Richard O’Connor

quotes #3


If you’re not in the present, you lose everything that is around you.”
-SoKo


“We say we waste time, but that is impossible.
We waste ourselves.”
-Alice Bloch


“Blanket statements are always stupid. NO EXCEPTIONS!”
-Craig Benzine